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QUESTION: My girlfriend and I have been in a lesbian relationship for nine months. She had dated several girls before me and had sex with a few of them. She was my first. There was a lot of sex in the beginning of our relationship, but as it progressed the sex has dwindled to being once every two or three weeks. I asked her why, since every time I try to steer us towards sex she demurs or says that I keep trying to make “sex dates” and that that is unromantic. She said that our lovemaking was getting monotonous (she always asks for the strap-on). I disagree and I think that sexual intimacy is a very important part of a relationship. I don’t know how to convince her that lovemaking can never get monotonous. Do you have any advice?
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Dr. Debby Herbenick
category: Orgasm & Pleasure, Q&A 2008, Kinsey Confidential Podcast